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And yeah, this is pretty much a fair rap.
I wish people would simply realize that the EXPECTATIONS we place on women are one of the basic roots of misogyny. And EXPECTING the opposite of what the patriarchal society expects does nothing to help. The woman who goes to work should not be shamed, but neither should the woman who wants to stay and home and bring up her children. If we expect her to do one or the other, then we've stripped her of her of her choices and left her exactly where she began. What we need to do (among other things, of course) is break down the expectations of gender roles and let people--men and women and everyone in between--to fill the the roles in society that THEY want to, free of conditioning, shame, and judgement.